After reading Chapter 1 of your textbook, spend a couple of your class periods observing your colleagues and recording what you perceive to be their different listening habits and what kind of attentiveness or involvement they send through nonverbal communication. Write about your findings in a two-paragraph memo.

*If you do not have other classes, then please perform this same activity with your group of family, friends, or observe strangers in social settings.

i don’t have other classes, so please write the family, friends or observe strangers.

Here is Chapter 1 reading:

Nonverbal Communication and Listening Skills

Not many subjects are as inseparable as business and communication. In its multitude of forms, communication sustains, promotes business; a business, any business could not exist if communication principles were removed from it.

When most of us think of communication, we think of reading, writing, speaking. And while these three components are certainly pronounced channels of communicating, sight and sound also play significant roles.

In fact, the role of sight and sound in nonverbal, listening, and speaking skills become just as important as the need to write clearly and well.

Nonverbal Skills

Psychologists have found that body movements and voice tone convey 93% of a message, while actual words transmit 7%. Nonverbal communication is divided into four areas: paralanguage, kinesics, image, and proxemics.

Paralanguage is how the voice communicates through vocal qualities such as pitch, tone, inflection, volume, emphasis, and verbal noise. Paralanguage reveals the underlying emotions of words, and an increased awareness of how a person speaks (the passion or lack of passion present in language) will only increase a person’s actual speaking skill.

Kinesics is better known as body language, a study of how the body communicates popularized by Julian Fast’s text, Body Language. Studying and interpreting body language, however, comes with one large drawback: it is not an absolute. We may stand, move, sit, or scratch our heads truly and completely oblivious of what innate meanings those gestures communicate. As with paralanguage, we do need to better understand, though, what kinds of movements transmit what kinds of meanings. Even if we are not aware of those meanings, others may be. Walking and gestures with purposeful, illustrative movements indicate decisiveness. Sitting upright with feet planted firmly on the floor demonstrates alertness and interest. As well, happy facial expression, strong eye contact, good posture, and clearly articulated gestures have a positive effect on audiences.

Image as nonverbal communication reveals that appearance can be everything. Our clothing, hygiene, work environment (neatness, decorations), and even documents we produce reveal the professionalism of our demeanors.

Proxemics can be defined as the interplay of space and communication. We all come with our own territorial bubbles, the invisible space that surrounds us and keeps us comfortable. If someone moves into that space uninvited, then we may feel threatened. Our genders, cultures, and experiences determine the size of our personal territory, but sociologists characterize the following zones:

Intimate space: 0-1 1/2 feet

Personal space: 1 1/2- 4 feet

Social space: 4-7 feet

Public space: 10 feet- bounds of hearing

Listening Skills

In any discussion of listening, the act of “listening” needs to be distinguished from “hearing.” Hearing is an unconscious, involuntary activity. We are always hearing something; at no point is our hearing actually turned-off. Listening is voluntary. Listening is physical. Listening is conscious. We choose to listen (or not listen), and how we listen is affected not just by what we are listening to, but also by who we are, when we are listening, why, in what setting, and to what end. For many people, listening is relegated to a passive, unconscious status. Only 25% of what we listen to we retain. Those who retain more than 25% are good listeners, active listeners.

There are several barriers to good listening:

Physical barriers. If we are physically removed, physically impaired from hearing well, we cannot effectively retain what we do hear. It simply just goes to reason. Among the barriers to good listening, this is one of the most manageable. If we cannot hear well because of noises or distance, then either stop the noise or move to another, better position. If it is unclear what you have heard as a result of physical barriers, ask for clarification.

Psychological barriers. If physical barriers are the easiest to combat, psychological barriers represent the hardest. We all come with our own “baggages“: cultural, ethical, personal values that shade how we interpret the information we encounter. The good listener is aware of the various complexes which affect the decoding of a message; the strong listener is actually able to suspend personal perceptions and wait until a message is entirely complete before reacting. But it is that task, suspending our own knowledge, that is difficult. Restraint is key. If a listener is self-aware and senses that she is immediately reacting to and thinking about something read or said,she needs to quickly set aside that reaction until the message is complete. Easier said than done, yes–but also necessary.

Language. The very means of communication, the words we use, can serve as significant barriers if a communicator’s vocabulary is not appropriately matched to the audience. Overly simple, overly complex, overly jargonish, overly connotative words prohibit accurate listening. As in many cases, be aware of language and how a communicator uses diction.

Nonverbal distractions. Nonverbal communication can certainly send messages, and we may certainly interpret them. However, nonverbal communication can also represent noise. Distracting gestures, inappropriate dress, a lot of verbal noise, for example, can disrupt an audience’s listening abilities. Unfortunately, nonverbal distractions from a communicator cannot be prevented, as awareness and correction is dependent upon the communicator. However, through strong feedback, an audience can improve the accuracy of the message received.

Thought speed. We think more slowly than we hear. In fact, sometimes by the time we fully process what someone has said to us, the message may be complete. As always, follow-up through specific questions and requests for clarification can help fill in any gaps.

Faking attention. We all, at one point or another, zone out during listening. We may look alert, may even set our head on “automatic nod,” but we aren’t paying attention. Active listening is something of a catch-22. If we are actively involved in a message from the outset, then we will stay actively involved throughout. Remember, listening is physical. If we are physically active in listening, it becomes harder to zone out.

Grandstanding/One-upping. While listening, the best thing for any person to do is to listen. When someone is speaking, don’t speak. When someone is speaking, don’t jump to conclusions. When someone is speaking, don’t listen just for details, don’t bury yourself in note-taking, don’t react subjectively–and, don’t be thinking of what you will say in turn. It’s the conversational equivalent of keeping up with the Joneses.

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